f Notes from the Underground: More Crumbs
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Tuesday, February 03, 2009

More Crumbs

Crumbs -02- 


Helen was, certainly was, a shy and timid girl, certainly girl. For Fred it was the autumn of crocodile tears, when for a month he had to wish, yes that is true sometimes the most you can do to attain something is wish, to gain access to a world he was not entitled to for two reasons: he was poor and secondly because he was really too young. But we are not comparing the two, since it will be an unjust comparison. She was rich without knowing how to care, her mind completely void of the concept of beauty and femininity. I daresay, but she was innocent to the point of being unknowledgeable about necessities of being a woman and dumb to the extent that she couldn't distinguish praise from sarcasm. But what saved her from general humiliation was her unique characteristic of having been saved from loss of innocence at her age. 

Helen knew what the woman 'Helen' was and that saved her a lot of embarrassment. In days before Fred had started his work on unearthing Helen, she was a loner. She generally chose to keep to herself and spoke only when there was no way out, and even then too with great effort and visible embarrassment. After a while she befriended, or was befriended by, a lovable little doll of a woman Stephanie and another girl Maggie. Apparently Maggie was (just like her name suggests) the stereotypical fat friend who would tag along wherever you may take her, another one of those loyal to the extent of idiocy. Friendships are built upon common interests and characteristics, for these three the common factor was varying brands of innocence and their shared embarrassment owing to the lack of their feminine beauty. Maggie was fat and far less intelligent than Helen; she was good for her self esteem.  

Confidence is the measure of moral fibre in oneself which makes him stand tall chin up in front of the mirror. When someone pretends to be accommodating and overtly understanding it shows his lack of confidence and an insecurity regarding his person. On the contrary, arrogance and indifference also depict a person's deeper feeling of how unsure they are about themselves. Fred will be a difficult one to asses because characters that are born as a need to provide a universe to the protagonists are metaphors themselves. However, Helen was undoubtedly one belonging to the former category of people those who hid their real souls, their actual feminine self, covered behind a facade of understanding and even defeat. 

Out of the blue let me introduce to you Nancy. Nancy woke up everyday thinking of one guy or another she could've slept with, it wasn't like she was not attractive; dark chocolate complexion, long tresses flowing as low as her waist, heavy breasts and proportionate ass made for a figure many women desired before reaching puberty. Though she was a little heavy around the waist but that was one flaw all her bedmates accepted on account of her comfy breasts. Nancy was the only child of her parents, rich parents I might add, and that gave her the choices she didn't know were worth ages of hard work. As soon as she realized that she is a woman, nothing seemed to be an obstacle in her way to explore what womanhood had in store for her. It was that curiosity that got her into bed with men, average in most ways, early in her pubescent life. Flirting became her favourite sport, and she was not afraid to take play dangerously. So at the time she enters Helen's universe, she had more experience at the matter sex than Helen's mother. The idea of sexual intercourse being a concern of proverbial heart is a incredulous one, whoever in the history of mankind thought of relating love with 'making-love' was either having a laugh or didn't know any better. Has anyone ever thought of a celibate as a symbol of hatred or fear?

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