f Notes from the Underground: shadow of my soul
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Saturday, May 15, 2010

shadow of my soul

Before nervous breakdown sets in, I feel I must wash mi hands. Hardly anything of value to write but if I'm messed up enough to be 'here' then...so be it. If I understand correctly, I hardly want to write abhi. You see, laying words on paper is a craft; expression comes from the mind not from the soul but what is expressed is conceived by the soul, or the proverbial heart. Right now, mi soul is having a hard tyme staying in the container of mi body; it has lost its shadow and now it wants to break out of me and claim it back.

Is that really my soul? It could be an empty stomach. Nah! Something is trying to breakaway from me; I can feel my skin stretched, the organs out of place, my mind about to - not explode, but - melt. I reckon I should think on a tangent.

The expression 'mi lady' does not imply possession. Of what I know I can tell, it was a novel set in late 1700s. 'mi lady' is equivalent to say... ah! that's the word: 'mi lord' - now, no one will argue 'mi lord' implies possession and submission. 'mi lady', the term, was used by chauffeurs, men in staff and general public when addressing their countess/dutchess - any noble lady. They could've hardly implied possession without the risk of getting their heads chopped of.  The term is an expression of respect and high esteem. I'm not a linguist, or a historian, but I think the use of this term was completely abolished only after the Feminist Movement. I strongly suggest that no reader use this detailing of 'mi lady' for academic purposes; what I write here is hardly ever thought through and never researched.   

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